Careers for Magical Creatures: A Fairy Godmother's Guide to Conduct with Clients
by Sarina Dorie
You've passed your fairy godmother classes with top honors and landed yourself a job with the Division of Fairy Godmothers. What's the next step? As you apprentice for your new career, keep a copy of Fairy Godmother Conduct handy.
Being a fairy godmother is a rewarding career for an immortal that involves helping nobles and heroes on a daily basis. This prestigious job isn't for everyone. Some fairies are destined to work as shoe repair elves, garden fairies, and minimum wage elves in the Santa Industries a.k.a. Santa's sweatshop. But not you. You're better than those lowly immortals.
Below is a guide for conduct expected of fairy godmothers, developed after one fairy got too close with a noble and breached the godmother-godchild relationship. Make sure you look over this list and consider whether you can adhere to the, "Don't ask, don't kiss and tell," policy of DFG (the Division of Fairy Godmothers) before your first day on the job.
1.) Keep conversations with your human godchild appropriate, respectful, and professional.
2.) Under no circumstance should you ever kiss Prince Charming.
3.) Do not keep pinups of all the most eligible princes in the land in your office with hearts drawn around your favorite.
4.) Under no circumstance should you ever make out with Prince Charming in a carriage.
5.) Do not engage in quid-pro-quo relationships in which you offer a noble special powers, riches, or a hundred years of sleep in exchange for sex.